Supporting Your Middle Child

Three children sitting with their backs to the camera
(Seljan Salimova via Pexels)

“Middle child syndrome” is a common phrase used to describe how middle children may feel left out or frequently compared to their siblings. In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, these are the best ways to support your middle child based on research and advice from parenting experts across the country.

Do:

  • Give all kids equal attention, both individually and as a family.
  • Take note of “firsts” for all children.
  • Encourage differences between siblings.
  • Communicate openly with your kids and encourage them to do the same with you.
  • Let your middle child make decisions.
  • Make sure your middle child has friends and relationships outside of their immediate family.

Don’t:

  • Compare your children’s successes or failures to one another.
  • Make your middle child resolve fights between siblings.
  • Only give your middle child hand-me-downs from their older siblings.
  • Force a middle child to pursue the same hobbies as their older siblings.

Local Resources

To further support a middle child, family therapy providers such as The Sibley Group (Washington, D.C.), Crossroads Family Counseling Center (Fairfax, VA) and The Tree House CAC of Montgomery County (Rockville, MD) focus on improving relationships within the family by addressing conflict resolution, communication and emotional needs

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