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Managing Money for Mom
By Amy A. Brandts, CLU, ChFC
Your mom seems a bit more forgetful lately. Perhaps she’s OK for
now; but how will you be able to tell when she does need help
managing her finances? Like most in her generation, she is proud of
her ability to manage on her own and is resistant to admitting that
things are a little harder for her now.
Don’t wait to bring up this touchy subject, but approach it with
tact. Ask whether her pension and social security are enough to
cover her expenses. The conversation may be awkward at first, but
chances are, she will be relieved you brought it up. Making some
simple arrangements now, while she’s still relatively healthy, is
far easier than the challenges of responding to a sudden crisis.
Make a List
What questions do you need to ask? Will you need to know specifics
about her income and expenses, as well as the value of her assets
and her debts? Make a list of:
- Pension income, social security and military pensions,
including spousal benefits
- All bank account values
- Safety deposit box contents, location and key
- Investment account values
- Credit card or other debt
- Expenses – scrutinize these carefully for unnecessary
expenditures
Check it Twice
Watch for those Red Flags – frequent transfers from savings to
checking, disconnect notices from utility companies, overdue bills,
threatening letters from banks or collection agencies. Also watch
for inappropriately large or frequent charitable contributions.
These are the most serious signs that she needs your help. More
subtle signs can include missed doctor’s appointments, multiple
magazine subscriptions or being susceptible to overzealous
salespeople. Immediately consult a physician if you suspect
depression, substance abuse or dementia – all of which can affect
spending habits and result in a variety of other behaviors that can
significantly impact finances, as well as general health and well
being.
Where is she now?
You need to find out whether she has enough to live on now, whether
her money is being managed well and if she is getting an appropriate
return on her investments, given her age and income need. Find out
if she has long term care insurance that might be available to help
pay caregiver expenses, should she need them. Also, does she have
health problems that affect her ability to manage money now or might
it affect her in the future?
Professional Resources:
- A financial planner for comprehensive financial help,
including diversification of assets, insurance questions or an
income/expense analysis
- A geriatric care consultant or social worker – to review
safety and living arrangements and coordinate care providers
- An attorney – for wills, trusts, power of attorney, advanced
medical directives and living wills
- Accountants – for tax preparation and planning
How do you prepare for the future?
First it helps to simplify things. Consolidate accounts and have
pension, social security and other income delivered by direct
deposit. Have routine bills, such as mortgage payments, insurance
and utility bills paid automatically out of a single account. This
reduces trips to the bank and assures payment of critical expenses.
Choose someone to have signing authority (as power of attorney) on
her accounts. This could be you, another sibling or a trusted third
party. This gives you the ability to write checks, pay bills and
sell assets as needed. This can be accomplished with a Durable Power
of Attorney, a document drafted by a lawyer, however, many
investment firms also have their own power of attorney forms they
prefer you to use and are specific to their accounts.
Avoid the common mistake of listing yourself as joint owner on her
accounts. While a joint account is easier to establish, it is
subject to risks. If you are the joint owner, your creditors could
attempt to attach those assets to pay your debts, or your estranged
spouse could claim that the account was part of your marital assets.
Remember that managing money for an older person requires different
investment strategies than for someone of your own generation. Your
most important goal is to make certain that she has adequate income
to meet her changing needs and doesn’t run out of money. Don’t let
your financial decisions be unduly influenced by the concerns of
heirs over future inheritances.
Consult her doctor if you have any concerns about physical health or
safety. Have her sign a medical release, authorizing her doctor to
share her medical information with you.
Create a “Document Locator List” and write down the location of all
the pertinent legal documents such as: original will, trust
documents, powers of attorney, location of safety deposit boxes,
names and numbers for all bank and investment accounts and any other
written instructions indicating her desires in the event of an
emergency.
What does her future hold?
Well clearly, no one can predict the future. But the best gift you
can give your mom is allowing her to age with dignity. This means
helping her maintain the highest level of independence that she can
and understanding her wishes. It also means recognizing that there
may be a time when she can’t manage alone and easing her adjustment
to this by gracefully accepting it and planning for it.
Amy Brandts is a financial planner and founder of Symphony
Financial, an independent fee-based financial planning firm in
Herndon, VA. She specializes in working with the "Sandwich
Generation," those who are sandwiched between the needs of their
children and their elderly parents. To reach Amy, call 703-481-9876
or email her at
abrandts@symphonyfinancial.net.
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