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Infertility Does Not Mean
the End of the Road to Parenthood
By Meryl B. Rosenberg
Infertility strikes in many different ways and is highly
prevalent in today’s society. Causes may include medical
issues or age. It also impacts same sex couples, who often
must turn to infertility specialists in order to have a
family.
The good news is that being “infertile” no longer means that
you cannot have children of your own. There are options to
turn to when you cannot have a family through what we know
of as traditional means. More and more people are choosing
surrogacy and egg donation to create the family that they
long for and dream of.
Surrogacy has actually been around since Biblical times –
Sarah turned to her handmaid in order to give her husband
Abraham the child he so wanted. However, only since modern
times has surrogacy really become a more common method of
having a family when couples are not able to do so
otherwise. And it is more common than you think! There are
hundreds of successful surrogacy arrangements occurring
every year.
There are generally two types of surrogates. One is referred
to as a traditional surrogate, where the surrogate is a
woman who becomes pregnant through artificial insemination
using the intended father’s sperm. The other is referred to
as a gestational surrogate, or carrier; where the surrogate
becomes pregnant through the in vitro fertilization process.
In that case, usually (but not always) the intended father
is the sperm donor and the intended mother or an egg donor
provides the eggs.
When people first started choosing surrogacy as a path
toward parenthood, most of the cases involved a traditional
surrogate. However, as medical technology has advanced
vis-à-vis in vitro fertilization (IVF), more and more people
have elected gestational surrogacy rather than the
traditional methods. It also appears that many choosing
surrogacy are more comfortable not having a genetic tie to
the surrogate. As well, many surrogates are more comfortable
carrying a child for someone with whom they have no genetic
tie.
In general, the medical world has embraced gestational
surrogacy as a way to have a child when other options are
not possible. Doctors often work very closely with surrogacy
professionals to move intended parents along the surrogacy
path. Even when the intended mother cannot produce her own
eggs, or if there is not an intended “mother” in the
picture, egg donation has provided the opportunity to have a
child through surrogacy.
Of course, there are certainly many cases where the intended
mother can carry a child herself, but needs to turn to an
egg donor in order to have that child. These days, egg
donors are available through most IVF centers and through a
number of reputable donor agencies around the country.
The world of surrogacy and egg donation need not be a scary
one. There are numerous qualified professionals in the field
to turn toward to guide you through the maze of surrogacy
and egg donation so that you are fully protected and
confident in the process. If surrogacy or egg donation is
right for you, your physician should be able to steer you in
the right direction.
Your infertility journey may not take you on the route that
you anticipated, but it is important to remember that the
journey toward parenthood is an exciting and wonderful one
that can have a happy ending.
Meryl B. Rosenberg, Esq. is the director of Parenting
Options, a comprehensive program specializing in surrogacy,
egg donation, and adoption. She has been working in the
field of reproductive technology and adoption for close to
thirteen years; assisting hundreds of people build their
families through these pathways. She is also an active
participant in furthering the education, development and
expansion of the field of reproductive law. For more
information contact her at 301-217-0074 or send an email to
ppac@comcast.net
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