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The First
Day of School Tears
The first day of school has always been always hard
for me. Each year as I watched my children pack up
and head off to learn and grow I would look after
them and realize how quickly they were growing. I
was proud of them and glad they liked school. I was
also sad.
I know a lot of other moms who also experience a
sense of sadness along with the happiness of
beginning a new school year. Many have told me how
they stood behind the door and secretly cried as
their little ones went off to their first day of
kindergarten or first grade.
I have done that many, many times. With four
children, there have been plenty of “first day of
school” experiences. There have also been buckets of
“first day of school” tears. There I have said it. I
admit it. I cry every year! I just can’t help it.
The first day of the 2005-2006 school year was not
any easier for me. Many of you know that my youngest
child, Brittany, is now in college. She is a junior
this year. You would think that the first day of
school would be much easier and I would be past the
crying. No, not me! It just never gets any easier.
For the first time ever, this year I helped my
daughter move into her dorm room without the help of
her dad. He was not able to join us but she wanted
me to come and help. We were happy and excited as we
flew down to her school (Florida Institute of
Technology in Melbourne, Florida) a day early and
stayed at a really nice hotel. That was fun. That
night we went to a great restaurant with a friend of
hers. That was also very fun and special. We went
shopping for a few things at the local mall.
Shopping together is ALWAYS fun!
The next day move-in was easy and we certainly did
just fine without dad. But we did miss his company.
Although I admit there were several times as we
hauled one load after another when we talked about
how much “fun” dad was missing.
This year Brittany was a leader for the incoming
orientation of new students at FIT. The evening of
our second day in Melbourne there was a pizza party
and meeting for the Panther Prep Leaders. Brittany
asked me to go along to the meeting. That WAS REALLY
FUN. I was the only parent in a room of 50 student
leaders. I watched them get to know each other with
some fun team building activities and I was able to
see Brittany in action as she worked with the other
students. I felt like a fly on the wall watching my
daughter in her element. It was absolutely
fantastic.
The next day was the first day of orientation
seminars and Brittany had an early meeting. She
asked me to come by for an early breakfast before
she had to head off to her meetings. I arrived right
on time and we shared a great breakfast at her
kitchen bar.
Then it was time to say goodbye. She was ready to
get to work and I was off to meet dad at the beach
for a short weekend together. We had one of
Brittany’s roommates take our picture so we could
continue our family tradition of a “first day of
school” photo, then Brittany walked me to my car and
we said goodbye. She turned to go off to her meeting
and I went to get in my car. The tears were building
in my eyes as I turned and watched her walk away.
All I could think about was that my little baby was
a junior in college and a leader on her campus. She
was all grown up and very confident. I was proud but
sad.
And, just as I felt the first tears roll down my
cheeks, I saw the other students walking toward me.
Oh, no! I could not cry in front of the other kids.
That just would not do. I bit my lip and thought,
“Don’t cry, don’t cry, whatever you do, DO NOT cry!”
Quickly I put the car into gear and pulled away from
the curb. One of the students waved and I waved back
with a big forced grin on my face. “Don’t cry, don’t
cry, what ever you do, don’t cry!” I kept saying
over and over in my mind. Finally I pulled out of
the parking lot and around the corner. I calmly
pulled the car into a close driveway and put it into
park. Then I cried. These were definitely tears of
joy and pride. It just never gets easier.
Enjoy the beginning of a new school year, and
remember; it’s okay to cry.
‘Til October and our annual guide to Theatre and the
Performing Arts, Happy Parenting!
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