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Being the MVP in Your
Child’s Life
by Loriann Hoff Oberlin
“Be a hero – stay involved – make a difference” — these are
the lines to live by, promoted by Peter Benson, Ph.D.,
President of Search Institute, which these days brings
parents the website
www.MVParents.com . It’s an initiative making its way
around the country inspiring parents to come together around
common values and concern for their children’s growth and
development.
“The Most Valuable Parent is a national campaign where we’re
trying to support parents all across the country at being
the very best they can be in their kids’ lives. Hence the
term most valuable players, most valuable parents,” says
Benson on his recent trip across the country visiting such
cities as Washington, D.C. The group, Search Institute,
which he leads with this community initiative, tries to
convey how parents can make their child a success — how to
be a really powerful parent so that children and teenagers
make great choices and minimize at-risk behaviors, such as
underage drinking.
“Even the best of parents can use more ideas, more support,
more tactics and strategies for continuing their great work
as families,” Benson added, “But we believe that all
families need to remember on a daily basis what parents do
to build strong kids.” The material the group generates
isn’t exactly “new information” as much as good old
reminders succinctly packaged and promoted so that it
catches on.
Search Institute’s Role
Founded in 1958, Search Institute generates cutting-edge
ideas, research and strategies for growing healthy children
and helping them to thrive in today’s culture.
www.MVParent.com
links up well with the practical and historic ideas at
Search Institute, Benson says, where the focus is all about
raising great kids. Plus, it combines the group’s
intellectual capital with spreading information throughout
the U.S. with a national TV ad campaign, the website where
parents can access material free-of-charge, a newsletter,
information about how you build developmental assets, a free
weekly parenting tip sheet, and a new book called Stay
Close, with creative ideas on how to connect when you’re
apart. Benson calls this book great for single parents and
grandparents, especially. While some of the group’s
resources are offered for purchase, they disseminate other
material without cost.
The Framework: 40 Developmental Assets
“We’ve created this framework of 40 nutrients of positive
life,” Benson says, “with 40 building blocks that are really
the recipe for growing great kids, the nutrients needed for
positive youth development based upon years of scientific
work that resonate with all parents regardless of income,
race, ethnicity. Those are the daily experiences, having
validity for families.”
So what’s included in these 40 gems? The Minneapolis,
Minnesota-based group categorizes these 40 developmental
assets into external assets of support, empowerment,
boundaries and expectations, and constructive use of time;
plus, internal assets such as the commitment to learning,
positive values, social competencies, and positive identity.
Each has sub-topics or ideas. For instance, the group
identifies support by family support, positive family
communication, other adult relationships, caring
neighborhood, caring school climate, and parent involvement
in schooling. Under the constructive use of time, the
organization urges kids to spend time in creative activities
such as arts and music, youth programs, religious community,
and time at home. Visit the
www.MVParent.com
website to download the PDF file to post on your
refrigerator to remind your family of these healthy building
blocks.
Dr. Benson reports that the more assets exist in a child’s
life, the more there are profound decreases in at-risk
behaviors. As the risks get lower, the very protective
factors inhibit risky behavior. “We know that as assets
rise, the risk of using alcohol for teenagers declines,”
Benson reports, citing the statistic that kids with the
assets are 15 times less likely to use alcohol.
Six hundred communities and schools use the MVParents model
to get everyone on the same page of a child’s life. Each
community may use the material differently, but each comes
together with the same message. Among those across the
country engaged in the MVParents model: Howard County,
Maryland; churches, school and parent groups in Alexandria,
Virginia; the YMCA in Washington, D.C.; schools in the five
boroughs of New York City; San Jose, California; and
Albuquerque, New Mexico.
First, the group’s passion promotes scientific study on what
kids need to succeed, but this collection of committed
parents and community members speaks to the second part of
their mission mobilizing parents through the unique blend of
publishing, training and consulting that the Search
Institute engages in.
When asked what makes MVParents most compelling and unique,
Dr. Benson offered that it’s clearly organized around
strengths to be built instead of problems to be prevented.
With this approach, “a different energy begins to happen, it
really is about all of community, leaders, youth, etc.” he
says. “Once the asset language becomes common, it’s a work
that penetrates all sectors of society.”
Adults today don’t spend as much time with their teenage
kids, and without that influence, young people will
gravitate to their peers and any influences there. The
program applies to parents of all kinds including
single-parent families and all income levels. Of 2.2 million
middle and high school kids extensively studied in research
from across the country, on average, kids have 19 of the 40
developmental assets, Benson asserts. By their senior year,
they have only 17 of these. So much work needs to be done to
steer children and adolescents in the right direction he
maintains. Otherwise, you can quickly see that kids will
lose what you’ve worked so hard to accomplish sometimes in
their formative years.
Peter Benson sums up the most valuable parent mission by
saying, “Kids ought to grow up in community where they are
at the center of civic life and people want to be in their
lives rather than hurriedly avoid them, which happens in too
many cities.” Positive relationships equate to asset
building, and it’s an ongoing process, not a one-time
program. Start now so that you, your family, and your
community reap the benefits for years to come!
Sidebar: So what’s included in these 40 gems? External
assets include support, empowerment, boundaries and
expectations, and constructive use of time; plus, internal
assets such as the commitment to learning, positive values,
social competencies, and positive identity are also at work.
Each has sub-topics or ideas. Visit the
www.MVParent.com
website to download the pdf. file to post on your
refrigerator to remind your family of these healthy building
blocks.
Short Version of the 40 Developmental Assets
External Internal
Support Commitment to Learning
Empowerment Positive Values
Boundaries and Expectations Social Competencies
Constructive Use of Time Positive Identity
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